Privilege of wrecking me

I’ve died a thousand lives,
I’ve lived a thousand deaths,
To find that girl whose smile is silent silver.
Just so that I’d suffer the Sinful calm, like the oceans do after storms.

She could do that. She was calm, understanding.
Ever since, my short life became a long quest to find her.
I’d found her once, I would do it again.
For her, I could never answer,

How the dark of her eyes, danced with my Angels and,
How the light of her eyes, silenced my demons.

Soon I found her, right where I lost her.
She was the same, she was nothing but the storm that wrecked me, and in that moment,
I realized I ha been naïve, and stupid.
Oh! how she wrecked me, and how oblivious of me to let her.

So, I looked into her eyes as the sun kissed the horizon, and denied her the privilege to wreck me more.

That’s how I knew I’m over loving her and that I was better off without her.
-Lazarus

 

 

 

Our Dance together

A Black suit on naked skin , I stood there waiting for you , under the spotlight , in a black dress.
Your face lights up with happiness when your favourite song comes on.
Lucky me , I got my dance.

In that moment , we were already lustful of love. My hand ran down your dress and I held you by the waist , and you rest your hand on my shoulder , which was yours to cry on anyway.
We danced there , blissfully unaware of the great things we were destined to do and how this Universe would bring us together.
We continued to dance , in the dim light , that almost passed for twilight.

We danced there alone , yet together.
I was to keep you safe and you were to keep me avid.
And as the singer hit the highest note, I pulled you closer , the warm air against my skin , and there we kissed , avid for love.
Hung over desires and craving , we danced as we realized , that as much as favourite songs and dances come to an end , sometimes , somethings last.

   -Lazarus

Pain of Separation

 

I loved the pain that I felt , when you held me and hugged me tight.

It was my ecstasy which always had me begging for more, even when it slowly killed me.

Now I hate that emptiness that fills my heart when you’re holding someone else and hugging them tight.

And I stare into the Starry night , standing , crying, wondering where it all changed.

 

-Lazarus

 

Shard of Glass

People look at my arm and ask,

How I suffered that deep cut.

I look at my arm , and answer ,

A piece of glass scarred me deep.

What they fail to understand is that,

She was the glass.

Delicate and shiny.

A little rough about the edges but very smooth if someone took time to look beyond the surface,

They would realize, she reflects.

She was strong , tough yet, soft and fragile.

She was predictable in her unpredictability.

I tried to polish her , and when I pressed hard, The glass broke and hurt me deep.

I look at my arm again, and say that it’s been a while but it still hurts , yet it doesn’t kill me.

-Lazarus

 

Oblivion

At the Inception of our Always , you were the Angelic Moon , and I , the Lover.

You looked at me, disgusted, as I was a Casanova.

And I looked at you,with love, as you were a Nova.

As you dared to reach out to me, I gladly put my hand out , holding for you.

You came , I embraced you.

We danced , slowly.

 

You walked away as the last note faded in the background , because I was incoherent and hideous.

I kept calling your name out , obliviously, that you would never turn back.

And now I drown myself in ballads, falling prey to my to my deepest fears of OBLIVION.

 

-Lazarus

 

 

To be honest , you had the most dreamy eyes, I had

ever seen. They managed to supress a thousand

thoughts into one word.

‘Beautiful’

That was pure beauty, the plain blackness , and the

little light, in the distance of heaven in your eyes,

which seem to have made a million musicians forget

how to groove, or how a thousand artists forget how

to make art, or how one , me , forget how to breathe.

That was beautiful.

Being unable to breath when I looked into the depth

of your eyes and find light.

It was pure.

It was everlasting.

It slowly killed me.

It was a rose for the Everafter.

­Lazarus